I really like AA members who do service. I have from the very beginning, even though I had no idea that AA service was a thing. When I attended meetings early on, some people stood out to me. They were the ones who reached out to unfamiliar people, looked them in the eye, and listened.
After I had been sober for about a year, a member from my home group suggested I serve as Intergroup Representative. I didn’t know what that meant, but my friend said I had nothing to worry about. If I just showed up, there would be plenty of people to help me out. I did, and I was amazed: it seemed like all of the people who stood out to me were in the same room! I had that same experience again when I later served as General Service Representative.
In the time since, I really have gotten a host of friends. For the past few years, any time I’ve attended an area event, I’ve been greeted by friends in the hotel lobby on my arrival. This even happened when I went to San Francisco for PRAASA and Canada for the Regional Forum! When I attend meetings in Vancouver, I almost always see a few people who are involved in District service. We love to talk about some service experience we’ve had since the last time we saw each other, which may only have been a day or two before.
What does this have to do with attracting people to service? I’m not really sure. I think that’s just how AA works. When we have a strong recovery experience, and a strong unity experience, and we get involved in service – we light up, and people see our spirit.
At my first Area Quarterly as District Committee Member for District 7, I asked if GSRs and members were welcome to attend, and why they may want to. Jerry, the Secretary at the time, beamed his wonderful smile and said, “Because they’ll meet people who love Alcoholics Anonymous!” Ever since, I’ve invited people to attend District meetings and any service event that I attend. The example we set when we get together – now that’s attractive!
Not everybody wants to do service beyond the group level. A few weeks ago, I attended a meeting where my friend Robert celebrated more than two decades sober in AA. He’s been very active in service, and regularly shares how much it has changed him for the better. Then I heard people say, “You’re such a wonderful example of what this program has to offer, I really admire you – I would just never want to do service the way you do!” Each time, this got a good laugh from the room. This ticked me off (not sure why, guess I have some inventory to do), but most of all I was confused. Didn’t these people see how ridiculous it is to want what this guy has, but be unwilling to do the things he’s done?
One thing I’ve learned in AA is that this is so much bigger than I can imagine, and I have no idea how we might connect with and help one another. Think of all the times you’ve been in a meeting, and someone has said the exact thing you needed to hear in that moment – and how that person probably couldn’t even remember what they said five minutes later. Think of all the people who have come before us, laid the groundwork; opening meetings, making coffee, setting up chairs, welcoming people, and putting out books. Think of the people who have invited you to meetings, where you met someone else who invited you to another meeting, and then still another person said “Get in the car” and you had your first conscious encounter with General Service. Who knows what link in the chain we get to be?
My job now is to be at the place where I may be of maximum helpfulness to others. I get to do this with AA members by connecting on the basis of our common experience as alcoholics, not viewing myself as worth more or less than them because of specific experiences we’ve had. When I do this, I leave the door open for someone to say, “AA service isn’t really my thing – but I know this guy Patrick who is all about it, you should talk to him,” or even better: “the District is doing some really cool stuff carrying the message, you should get hooked up with them.”
As I re-read what I’ve written, I’m pretty pleased at what appears to be a good, useful attitude towards AA service. Here’s the kicker: I learned it from you highly attractive people!